Reality Fantasy: Real World Skeletons - the introduction of Alicia

Week 4 of the Real World was high on emotion and low on scoring... the biggest development that occurred last night was the introduction of the first Skeleton - Alicia.  She's Sylvia's boss back at home and she kinda came off as liar and a loser.  Curiously enough... she seems to own some headspace within Sylvia tho'.  If Sylvia did't like her, she could always quit and work at another bar.  Alicia kinda freaked me out when she admitted to not being in control and being top dog in the house...  She didn't score any points and that was a good thing, seeing how Ashley is killing us this year in Fantasy points.

There were on Ballerz of the week this week.  The highest score was 30 points by Tony - who picked up 5 points for verbally fighting with Sylvia and 25 points for getting shit faced at the bar.

Sylvia dropped 25 points last night.  It was another crafty performance and I think she may be this season's MVP.  Here's how she collected her 25 points.

Victoria only picked up 5 points this week by verbally fighting with Alicia.  I'm terrified of what she's going to do next week...

5 points kissing Bruno
5 points crying over bruno
5 points blurcle - unintentional nudity
5 points verbal with Tony
5 points crying about tony and bruno and life

Full Scores and Rules here

Reality Fantasy: Real World Skeletons, Week 3: Sylvia just pissed her self in the confessional

It's kinda hart to think about this show and not think of my Reality Fantasy league...  by that I mean, I wonder if I could watch this show and still be entertained without tabulating points for shitty behavior.

I feel pretty confident in saying that I would... and that's due largely in part to seeing Sylvia walk into the confessional booth and pissing herself on the couch.  We don't currently have a point total for this in our Fantasy League - but I'm going to draw up an amendment this week and have everyone vote on it in the event someone else does it too.

Ballerz of the Week

Violetta = 75 points
Violetta continues to dominate Fantasy League play and is putting together an MVP season for the Ages.  She's averaging 58.3 points per episode (an all time high for Fantasy Reality Real World) and dropped an Episode Season High 75 without having sex or intentionally getting nude on TV.   We reached Violetta for comment and this is what she had to say:

Damn.   Lets look at the box score: 

5 unintentional nudity
20 for getting hammered
10 for kicking a road cone into the house
5 for kissing a stranger
10 for a three way kiss
5 for verbal with Jason
15 for being drunk on night 2
5 verbal with Tony

Violetta's drinking is so intense that I actually have to grade her and the housemates on a Curve.  I first have to ask myself.... ok she's wasted, but in comparison to other "wasted" performances - where is she at.  When her roommies get hammered, I have to ask myself...  but how wasted is she in comparison to Violetta?  I can't believe that the show is going to potentially spice up her behavior by bring in an arch nemesis into the house.  It simply isn't fair.

Sylvia = 60 points
So team Mercernaries put together an amazing Back Court by teaming Violetta with Sylvia who put up another 60 point performance.  Last week, she crafted 60 points by dipping and dunking and showcasing 5 tool player potential.  This week she efficiently dropped 60 by getting hammered twice.  20 points the first night and 25 points the second night.  She then picked up 5 points for kissing a girl and 10 points for participating in a three way kiss.  Sylvia then took her game to the next level by forcing me to amend our established rules to capture instances of pissing yourself.

Bruno = 45 points
I kinda debated leaving Bruno off the list this week...  he put together 20 points by way of forceful kisses and 25 points for sex in the Real World bathroom.  He seemed gleeful in becoming the first house member to have sex in the house...  I'm glad there's video evidence that it was consensual and he helped our team slide into 2nd place.

Point standings thru 3 weeks

Mercernaries = 320
Hurricane RhiRo = 115
#TeamLaunders = 80 

Reality Fantasy: Real World Skeletons: Episode 2 - Year of the Mercernaries

So we're two weeks into the Reality Fantasy league and I can safely assure everyone that there is no catching Ashley Mercer's team the Mercernaires.

How is this even possible?  Simple amigos... she's sitting pocket aces right now with Sylvia and Violetta who both dropped Baller of The Week performances last night...

Before getting to the point totals, I think Madison had 12 different outfits on in this past episode.  How is this even possible?

Point totals and Rules to the Game can be seen here.

Ballerz of the Week:
Sylvia: 60 points
Sylvia put together a beautiful outing and currently possesses the highest Point Per Episode point total for the season by getting 10 points for multiple kisses with Bruno, 10 points for denying coitus with Bruno, 20 points for intentional nudity (streaking), 15 drunken points and 5 points for verbally fighting with Madison.

I must say... I'm in total disbelief of how efficient her performance was tonight.  It was like seeing Chris Bosh have a big night on a basketball court.  You know she's good for 20 points per episode and then she has a performance like tonight where she drops 60 points in 60 minutes of play.  Beastly.

Violetta: 45 points
Violetta is a force of nature.  She dropped 45 points tonight with only 10 minutes of screen time and all she did was get slammered on the second episode.  I would have awarded 50 points but she managed to walk home and carry on in conversations unlike the first night where she seemed to disappear.

I think my favorite thing about her on tonights episode was being ok with the Bartender throwing trash at her at the bar.  Violetta brings it EVERY NIGHT!

She got tipped off by a friend out east that one of her (count them with me) TWO worst enemies is moving to Chicago to be on the show.  How does an adult even have archenemies?  Said enemy got some screen time and I'm pretty sure she's going to slut her way around the house.  This is become one of the best seasons of the Real World in recent memory.  

Honorable Mentions:
Tony: 25 points (20 of which came in a 4 way kiss - balleresque move but not Balleresque enough)
Nicole: 20 points
Bruno: 20 points 

It's kinda hard to get on the rest of the cast for weaker performances... its all about the edit you get for the week... but my boy Jason needs to step it up.  Madison went underrated and is picking up countless crying, verbal and kissing points...   The trailer for episode three - teases his dark side a little bit.  I need him to bring it home next week.  I need him to bring it home.

Reality Fantasy: Real World Skeletons | Week 1 - the Roomies Arrive

The first episode of Real World Skeletons aired last night and I have a lot of thoughts and reactions to share on this season’s cast…  The show’s format is nearly identical to last year in respect to the look and feel of the show.  They’re going to go beyond the realm of “ex’s” to bring in siblings, stalkers and baby mamas?

The show is a total departure of the show I grew up watching in the 90’s.  Specifically in the IQ and general “social awareness” department… 

While watching the show last night, I mentioned to Rhiannon that there was a character last year by the name of Cory.  He was one dimensional in that he was interested in getting with girls and working out.

Three male cast members were introduced last night and I couldn’t help but feel that they too were one dimensional.   If a riot or protest broke out into the streets of Chicago during the taping of this show - not only would these cast mates not care to become involved - they don’t strike me as a collection of people who have pulse on current events.

I know this sounds incredibly critical of people I’ve only seen on TV for an hour… but the show is no longer looking to looking to make any form of social commentary.  Unless they’re documenting the fall of Rome, which is the only reason I watch this show.  This show showcases our darkest reflection.

But enough about that shit, lets get to the BALLERZ of the WEEK.

Violetta - 55 points
I have nothing but mad respect for Violetta.  Not only did she arrive at the Real World House in a slutty dress but the first thing she unpacked was a bottle of Cuervo.  She took it out of a clutch that was designed to carry and only carry a bottle of Cuervo.

When she wasn't impressing me with her boozy ways, Violetta dropped her bottom lip and let us all know that she's THUG LIFE 4 life.  I need the internets to make Violetta and I friends in real life.  Lets make this happen people. 

Was anyone else amazed by how small she was in real life?  This is actually something that Rhiannon brought up while we watched the show together.  While laying in the swing bed with Date Rape Bruno (more on why I call him that in a minute) - regular sized bracelets fall all the way down to her fucking elbows.

Violetta straight up came out to play last night.

20 points for being drunk
5 points verbal fighting
10 points throwing coat rack
5 points kissing bruno
5 points kissing Sylvia 
10 points unintentional nudity

Honorable Mentions - 
Nicole -25 points (got hammered and passed out)
Sylvia - 25 points (carefully put together 25 by way of kissing multiple people 10 points, 10 points for being drunk, 5 points verbal fight with Madison)

Date Rape Bruno - 20 points - Bruno, aka #1 pick of the 2014 Real World Reality Fantasy Draft - displayed some big time 'point production potential'.  He kissed half of the women in the house within 24 hours of moving in and it kinda felt like he wanted to close in on Madison while he kicked it in the hot tub - promising to keep all of her dark secrets. 

He may have banged Sylvia in the confessional and we were tipped off to this possibility because we saw him putting his belt back on before they cut to commercial.

The thing that intrigued me most about Bruno last night was his interactions with the girls when he split up fights.  He kinda pulled them uncomfortably close to him to calm them down and potentially slip his tongue into their heads.  The thing that really felt slimy was his decision to hang back when the roommates went out to the second bar so he can try and creep on Violetta.   She asked him if he wanted to cuddle and told him they would never hook up...  this made him visibly disappointed.

The biggest reason for me calling him Date Rape Bruno, was the awkward conversation he had with Violetta the following morning after hitting up the bar.  Violetta said she didn't know what happened to her the night before... she thought she was ok and then got crazy drunk and felt it.  The same Violetta who started drinking Cuervo at noon the first day into the house...

Anyhoo - Bruno made a joke that was something to the effect of  "I roofied you".  

How crazy is that?

Real World Skeletons and the return of Reality Fantasy League

There’s a pretty good chance that you didn’t know that Real World Skeletons returns to MTV this evening…  as luck would have it, I did and I’m brining Reality Fantasy back from the DEAD.

I got a few co-workers to participate in a live draft a few weeks ago and here are the results of the draft.

Link to the Rules and Teams/Point Totals: Here

We drew cards to determine the following draft order:

• Team Hurricane RhiRo
• Team Mercernaries
• Team Launders

With the first pick of the reality fantasy draft, Team Hurricane RhiRo selected cast member BRUNO.  His online bio, leads us to believe that he’s certified nuts and he will single handedly bring home another Reality Fantasy Trophy.   The second pick of the draft, called on Team Mercernaries to pick up cast member SYLVIA.  She ranked #4 in our draft board and I kinda felt like this was a reach by Ashley…  I’m hoping all my years of watching the show will pay off.  Jaime picked third in the draft and selected cast member NICOLE for team Launders.  Nicole is kinda tricky because her bio was kinda scant on details…  we know that she’s a lesbian but we don’t really know much beyond that and she appears to be athletic. 

Each team went on to select a 2nd cast member… much to my surprise – Bruno fell into the second round and I’m pretty sure we have solidified our case for first place.  Guys are historically more combative and promiscuous on the show – so we should be dialing up big time points this season.

Scores and recaps to follow every Tuesday night.

Invite Only Costume Party & all things The Challenge Reality Fantasy Week 2

Saw the show on the night that it aired, but I haven't had a chance to recap the show until this evening.   I can't stress how much I love the shows new format.

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I ride and die with Camila 

It has completely turned the house upside down.  It's completely turned the Reality Fantasy League upside down!   The best team in our league just had 2 of her characters face off in the elimination challenge and of them (Frank) has been sent to the "Jungle" for a second consecutive week.

CLICK HERE for: Updated Scores and Rules

It almost makes sense to have weaker players on your roster because teams are going to continue sending the best players into the elimination to make it easier to complete the game.

I fucking LOVE this show.

Ballerz of the Week

Nany - 65 points
Nany, had a quality game and if she continues to perform well in the challenges, I think she has chance to lead the league in scoring.  She picked up 25 points for throwing a swing and slightly connecting on my Reality Fantasy Boo - Camila.  10 points for verbally fighting with CT and my Boo.  5 points for Crying... 5 points for kissing and 20 points for being drunk enough to start all the problems I described above.

Camila - 45 points
What's great about Camila is that we can always count on her having an emotional outburst like we saw in last weeks episode.  I can't believe that she didn't hook up with anyone after attending the Costume Party in a Catwoman costume.  Camila picked up 20 points for being wasted.  10 points for telling us that she's not on the show to make friends. 5 points for crying and another 10 points for verbally fighting with CT and Nany.  

Bottles and Bottles All Nite & all things The Challenge Reality Fantasy Week 1

THE CHALLENGE IS BACK!  

Order has finally been restored in the Reality TV world.  Tonights episode got off to an amazing start. I can't believe that I had never thought of merging "stripping" and "basketball" until this evening.  

To see Rules and Team Scores Click Here

CT squared up against Theresa and the two agreed to play to 10 points.  After each score, the opponent had to take off an article of clothing.   Shortly after winning the game, CT was presented with a chilled bottle of Vodka.   Not water boys and girls...  VODKA.  

Vodka is for CLOSERS.  

If the show allowed fans to pay money, so that they could see web feeds of the Challenge House - I would pay $49.99 to happily see and not get audio of the real-time footage for the season.   Make this happen Bunim/Murray.  Make this HAPPEN.

The first episode has way to much stuff to fully explore.  There's over 20 characters to follow, so I won't spend too much time recapping the activities.

The first challenge of the season was pretty awesome tho'.  It consisted of splitting the cast into 2 large teams.  Then breaking the team into 3 small groups to climb 42 flights of stairs - which resulted in a strange race/brawl.  After the stair climb was done, the groups then had to hand a key over to the second group so that they could solve a puzzle...   that group then relayed another key to the third group which was asked to walk on a rolling log suspended 42 stories above the ground to pick up a flag and ring a bell.

Camila is equal parts my spirit animal & the reality tv personality I most badly want to sleep with.  I LOVE YOU GIRL!

I fucking love this show.

The loosing team (half the house) was officially up to go into the elimination challenge/jungle...  Tonight's elimination involved shoulder pads, a sand pit and stuffing a ball into a trash can for points.   I'd explain it in further detail, but it defeats the purpose of you dropping everything you're doing and just watch the show.

Baller of the week.

LaToya - 55 points
LaToya fucking brought it in week 1 of the Challenge.  She picked up 20 points for causing the arrival of a vehicle with a Siren.  25 points for getting TJ to say "you killed it" and an additional 10 points for winning an elimination challenge.

LaToya is a BEAST.

The Challenge: Free Agents - Reality Fantasy DRAFT

We're only 5 days away from the Challenge returning to television and my office mates can't contain our excitement!   We conducted our Reality Fantasy draft on Thursday, here's the breakdown on what occurred...

Link to Complete Rules and Team Breakdowns 

The festivities began with the drawing of straws...  I picked the shortest straw so I ended up with the 5th & 6th pick of the snake draft.   

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Round 1 Picks

1st Overall Pick of the 2014 Challenge Fantasy League Draft: Hurricane Nia -  by Team Jaime.  Before we delve into how this was a COMPLETE shock to everyone in attendance, Jaime is new to our office, new to the league and new to the show.   She did however pick a player with a freakishly high ceiling.  Hurricane Nia would have likely gone in the top 10.  Nia is a 4 tool player: Drinker, Confrontational, Emotional and Promiscuous.  I'm down grading her on "physical specimen"...  I suspect she'll be lazy and I don't think she has the chops to stay in the game long enough to win.  She's earned the nickname "Hurricane" for a reason tho'.  Nia will undoubtedly turn the house upside down. 

Team Jaime later went on to pick: Aneesa, LaToya, Jemmye, Brandon.  
Overall draft grade: B- 

2nd Overall Pick of the Draft: CT - Team Sylvia
Sylvia just placed third in our Reality Fantasy Real World Ex-Plosions league.  She's a lifetime viewer of the Challenge, which will undoubtedly help her putting together a quality team.  Having CT fall into your lap is like tripping over a pile of gold bars on your way to the kitchen for a midnight snack.   I can't say enough about CT.  I've never had him on any of my fantasy teams, but he was atop my short list of round 1 depth chart players.  I'm especially worried about how he will behave with Diem off the show.  This pretty much means he will likely try to get with every girl in the house that likes a "bad boy".  

I just threw up a little in my mouth...  

Team Sylvia later went on to pick: Camila, Isaac, Jasmine, Swift
Overall draft Grade: A 

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3rd Overall Pick of the Draft: Frank - Team Glenda
Glenda is also new to the league and is has been watching the Real World/Challenge for over a decade.   She's been wanting to join this league since she caught wind of us playing last year and she put together a team that I think is built to win it all.   Frank in my opinion brings you the best bang for buck in Reality Fantasy.  He's a 5 tool player: Physical Specimen, Emotional, Confrontational, Drinker and Sexually Promiscuous.  He was in a relationship in the last season of the Challenge... his upside is limitless really.  I suspect that he will be out to prove that he's not one to push around after what happened last year with Knight.

Team Glenda later went on to pick: Dustin, Nany, Leroy, Jonna
Overall Draft Grade: A+

4th Pick of the Draft: Laurel - by Team Ashley
Ashley is our defending Reality Fantasy CHALLENGE champion.  In my opinion she took the best available player on the board...  I was hoping that she reached for a male contestant so that I could potentially pick up the best female participant on the show.   She's reached the final of every Challenge she's ever participated in and she will undoubtedly do fine without having to worry about being saddled with a teammate.  

Team Ashley later went on to pick: Cara Maria, Jordan, Chet, Theresa 
Overall Draft Grade: B+

Last pick of the first round: Johnny Bananas by Team Ro Ro
Picked up Johnny Bananas because he's a safe bet to go far in the Challenge.  He's a 4 time overall winner and he reached the finals last season.   Having a character active throughout the show is just as valuable has having a character score a lot of points but ultimately leave the show after 3 weeks.  My biggest fear is that he doesn't connect and establish friends with younger cast mates quickly.  He's quickly becoming one of the older members in the Challenge House.  The young will undoubtedly be out to extinguish him.

Team Ro Ro later went on to pick: Zack, Cohutta, Johnny (Portland) and Jessica (Portland)
Overall Grade: A-

All good things must come to an end. Reality Fantasy Real World Ex-plosion Season Finale

Well...  it took 11 weeks, but Team Ro Ro, put together enough points to over take the Mercernaries and we brought home the REALITY FANTASY League trophy!   The final episode was pretty entertaining to boot.  I need to figure out a way to grade the "Shit they should have shown" episode too.

To View Scores and Rules Click HERE

They're celebrating my Reality Fantasy WIN!

Team Ro Ro: 720 total points
Team Mercer: 690 total points

Before we get to Ballerz of the week, I want to quickly recognize some of the Reality Fantasy league leaders.

Highest Point Total in Single Episode: Ashley - 165 points
Total Points Scored in Reality League Season: Corey - 565 points
Highest Points Per Episode: Corey - 47.08 points per episode

Reality Fantasy Real World Ex-Plosion MVP: Corey

Ballerz of the Week 

Brian - 160 Points
Brian brought the goods this week.  He nearly cracked the point total that Ashley put up in week #1.  Brian pulled 100 points by getting into 2 fights and being restrained by security 2 times. 20 points for breaking things and a bed.  20 points for being wicked drunk. 20 points for random verbal fights.

Corey - 80 points
50 points - physical (2 times)
15 points verbal - w/Brian
15 drunk points - professing concern for Jenny

Go Go Dancing for Money and all things All things Reality Fantasy Real World Ex-plosion Week 11

As real world San Francisco 2014 draws to a close, this season has got me around to thinking about new rules that we need to add for future Reality Fantasy games.   Getting day drunk should be rewarded...  getting a job while on the real world, like you know... the real world - you should get you points for that too.   I especially want to reward points if a character brings up their families fortune in some capacity.  It's happened twice this season... once with Hurricane Ashley and another again in the past episode with Tom.  

If all goes well, my team should be able to surpass my co-worker's team in the last and final episode.

Ballerz of the Week
Brian - 70 points
Brian is quite possibly the best and worst thing about Real World Ex-Plosions...  he pretty much ruined a really good thing I had going with Corey getting "friends with benefits" on the show.  But he's provided so much unintentional humor.   While we don't award points for having creative undergarments - his police short boxer briefs were hilarious.   Brian picked up 15 points for verbal fighting with Jenny, 10 points for verbal fighting with Corey, 5 for verbal fighting with Tom, 10 pints for getting drunk at the bar, 5 points for kissing a girl and 25 points for getting physical in the last moment of the game.

Corey - 35 points
Welcome back to the winners circle Corey.  While you didn't bring home 1st, you're primed to have one of the most explosive season capping episodes that has ever been recorded.  I'm so fucking giddy about Wednesday that I can barely contain myself.   Corey picked up 25 for getting physical on the bus and 10 points for verbally fighting with Brian.

Tom - 30 points
Tom picked up 20 of his points for getting day drunk in Napa Valley and passing out on the limo-bus.  Keep it classy Tom.  He also pieced up an additional 10 points for verbally fighting with Jaime and Brian.   I wish I could have given you more for reminding us that you're rich... but we haven't baked it into the rules yet.